Quote by Augusten Burroughs
"You are a person with a sincere heart and, well, I hear people say your intentions are good."
When I first heard someone make a comment like this, it made me vaguely and abidingly uneasy, but I couldn't pin down why. A number of times now, I've heard it said by people of other people. It finally dawned on me recently: No one wants to be known by others for good intentions alone.
While good intentions signify that a person is not evil, they don't signify that a person is competent. In fact, if someone has to compliment you on your good intentions, chances are that they have a quibble with your actual actions. A big quibble. They think you're incompetent or stupid or unreasonable. They're just being too nicey-nicey or passive aggressive to name it to you, or to the person with whom they're speaking.
In my current opinion, telling someone else that "my intentions are good" is highly preferable to someone else saying to me, "Your intentions are good." The former is a reassurance. The latter is at best a condescending pat on the head, and at worst, a slap-down.
That's what I'm thinkin'.
I smiled as I read this my friend. Yes, you are right. It is massively condescending. If I am told my "intentions are good" I assume it means they feel I am fully incorrect in my "little assumptions" (said with a pat on my head).
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