As the Leader Changes

I recently met with my peers from our system of colleges and universities. We always begin our meetings with "institutional gossip," a time when we share the joys, disappointments, challenges and new things on the horizons at each of our institutions. It usually takes 2-3 hours to get through everyone's list, sometimes longer when we get sidetracked and do business along the way as a relevant topic comes up.

At the most recent meeting, Ron made a comment that has been rolling around in my head ever since.

"I've been told that the years a person has to spend in leadership is directly correlated with how much God wants to change them."

Is it true that God puts us in challenging spots until we learn what we need to learn? What does that say about God? And what does it say about us? My predecessor stayed in this position for 12 years, and this is my seventh. I'm one of the longest-serving of my peers in this system now. Some have come and gone within a few years. Which of us needed more changing?

In mulling this over I have thought about the things that change us in positions of leadership. It seems to me that they all fall into three categories.

The first thing that changes us is those times in which we fail at navigating a challenge well. Usually we don't see the lessons right away. With a few of those situations it has taken me five years of returning to the incident and reflecting on it, to feel like I've teased out the lessons. And sometimes we learn right away, apologize, change course if that option is still available.

The second thing that changes us is those times in which we meet a gut-wrenching challenge, address it with courage, and succeed. These are the most delightful. In the midst of a difficult situation it feels just as awful when you're going to succeed as it does when you're going to fail. For someone who wants to do everything right and treat everyone well, the anguish of not seeing the end from the beginning is real and sharp. Always, always, we also learn from these times.

The third thing that changes us is those times in which we are criticized. The more painful criticism comes from those who would like to see us gone, since those who want us to stay and succeed are much kinder. Bless them. The less kindly sort will always be present, even if there are only two or three. I've observed that there's often at least one person who would like to see the leader move on, who works in the inner circle with that leader. The leader must consciously choose to not allow the knowledge of that circumstance to unbalance their world.

Whatever the case, we all must make some decision as to what to do with the critics who would discourage us with intention of making us give up. In my opinion, if you know that God has called you to the place in which you serve, there are really only two viable options. One is to learn from the criticism and stay, and the other one is to evaluate the criticism as junk and stay. Either way, it is crucial to stay true to your sense of God's call.

I think we sometimes forget that everyone working in an institution is on a developmental path, even throughout their adulthood. I stand in awe of those who are kind to leaders through the learning curve, keeping them on as long as they are willing to continue learning from their experiences. Great is their reward in heaven...and on earth. They shall reap a seasoned leader who is able, stable, grateful and loyal, and who in turn is willing to be patient with the developmental journeys of those around them.

[This is written with thoughts of appreciation to a group of people interwoven through the fabric of my institution, people who have been open, non-judgmental, honest and encouraging even in my toughest learning moments.]